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Name: Calvin
Country: United States
State: Wisconsin
Metro: Madison
Birthday: 10/25/1982
Gender: Male
Interests: singing, vball, bball, horn, 7-11, commie history
Expertise: pretending i know what i'm talking about :)
Message: message me
Member Since:
7/9/2002
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| I received quite a lot of responses via email, gtalk, and facebook on the last entry but not a lot of comments... in any case I'd like to make two proposals in light of Regnerus's thoughts.
Marriage or Abstinence
I disagree with Regnerus that simply advocating for earlier marriage is a solution. I'm also wary of how Regnerus' approach may scapecoat biology instead of accomodationism, poor doctrine, or simple lack of discipleship/lordship.
Christian young adults -- including even college students or recent graduates -- need to make a conscious decision between marriage and abstention/continence/celibacy for the current season of their lives (see 1 Corinthians 7:9). This isn't super complicated hermeneutics -- both need to be realistic options since the alternative is compromise on multiple levels.
Our 21st century American evangelical theology has so distorted the idea of works-righteousness that we feel any prescription from any authority should either be intentionally broken or begrudgingly and half-heartedly obeyed. First, we all need to reject the self-serving, accomodationist mentality that says marriage is only for people already established in lucrative or prestigious careers. Likewise, we need to be able to reject or die to causes of unhealthy marriage pressure such as overbearing parents or self-imposed peer-pressure. Finally, we need to live like following Biblical instruction is a privilege. There is no single more tangible form of worship in this day and age: no praise songs, retreats, in-depth prayers, nothing. Following Biblical instruction, including on sexuality, honors God and others, and should strengthen identity and be a source of joy.
Sexual abstinence is a lifestyle seen by secular society as laughable, especially for men. What better way to follow Christ than one that simultaneously sets us apart, goes against expectations, and pictures the heart of God awaiting full consummation of his relationship with us? What a loss if we fail to cherish an opportunity that God has given us. Sure you get some collateral drama, failure, and angst... but can't the angst and the ridicule or awkwardness of nonconformity among society and friends be seen as thorns in our side for the glory of God and means by which to more deeply understand his heart? Let's desire rewarding, costly grace.
Odds Off...
There is blatant denial in American evangelicalism about the poor matchmaking odds for single devout Christian women. The 2:3 quantitative ratio of single male:female church attendance fails to capture the even wider qualitative divide. Many single Christian women are confronted with an almost continuous temptation to date or marry "down" or even "out" spiritually. Some hold out hope that, "God will provide the One for me as I wait patiently" while single men in Christian social environments enjoy attention they could scarcely dream of in a bar scene.
I'm going to propose a painfully obvious but potentially hurtful and offensive solution, especially coming from me as a male, for the sake of encouraging dialogue. I'm certainly open to the idea I could be completely wrong, but please respond directly by commenting.
Maybe cultural and societal pressure to marry and/or have kids is this generation's "Isaac" or "costly grace" for Christian women. Many women are raised to believe they will find true fulfillment, value, and affirmation solely as wives and mothers. Maybe single Christian women need to acknowledge and come to grips with possibly being in that 1/3 (or more). Maybe they must be prepared to choose between singleness and compromise, then emphatically reject the far worse alternative of competitive obsession of how to avoid being part of that 1/3. Sure, men may be called to singleness, too. However, culturally there's far more work to be done toward affirming women in singleness despite the numbers telling us they are and will be much more common than single men. I am not excusing men for our lack of leadership and growth in the Church, or the Church for failing to attract and disciple more men. We probably all need to reject and repent for many of the hierarchies that determine which women in churches are quickly "snatched up."
Shouldn't a maturing, non-conforming, transformative body of Christ work toward counter-culturally affirming women in singleness, encouraging them not to compromise, and helping them reject the lies of society -- often perpetuated within the Church -- that their only value is in marriage?
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| It's summer and marriage is in the air. I often complain about how living in semi-rural Wisconsin and hanging around a lot of evangelicals means I get to feel like a freak for being 26 and unmarried. "Goodness!" screams the transnational Asian American who lived in cities most of his life who was born when his dad was 40, "I grew up expecting to marry in my early to mid thirties!"
University of Texas sociologist Mark Regnerus makes the case in the latest Christianity Today for earlier marriage. He writes that Americans, including evangelicals, are damaging the institution of marriage by discouraging and delaying it. Some highlights:
- "...over 90 percent of American adults experience sexual intercourse before marrying. The percentage of evangelicals who do so is not much lower. In a nationally representative study of young adults, just under 80 percent of unmarried, church- going, conservative Protestants who are currently dating someone are having sex of some sort."
- Regnerus: "I'm certainly not suggesting that they cannot abstain. I'm suggesting that in the domain of sex, most of them don't and won't."
- "I am suggesting that when people wait until their mid-to-late 20s to marry, it is unreasonable to expect them to refrain from sex. It's battling our Creator's reproductive designs."
- "Among evangelical churchgoers, there are about three single women for every two single men. This is the elephant in the corner of almost every congregation—a shortage of young Christian men."
- "If she decides to marry, one in three women has no choice but to marry down in terms of Christian maturity."... "the fact remains that there just aren't as many serious Christian young men as there are women, and the men know it."
- ..."a key developmental institution for men—marriage—is the very thing being postponed, thus perpetuating their adolescence."
- "We buy, read, and pass along books about battling our sexual urges, when in fact we are battling them far longer than we were meant to."
- ..."the focus of 20-somethings has become less about building mature relationships and fulfilling responsibilities, and more about enjoying oneself, traveling, and trying on identities and relationships."
- ""So enough of the honeymoon banter: insiders know that a good marriage is hard work, and that its challenges often begin immediately. The abstinence industry perpetuates a blissful myth; too much is made of the explosively rewarding marital sex life awaiting abstainers."
I think just about anyone would agree with Regnerus' observations about prolonged adolescence and extended periods of trying different identities, professions, and so forth among twenty-somethings. Whether advocating for early marriage would actually combat this trend is highly debatable. While the statistics of sexual activity and also of unfavorable odds for Christian women -- and men who know it -- are disturbing, I don't see any solution for our scores of angsty, single Christian young adults any time soon...
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| The self-righteous, self-aggrandizing fuss over Terri Schiavo a few years ago sickened me and showed me just how foolishly dogmatic and out-of-touch the Religious Right and its wing of the Republican party were becoming.
I applauded Clint Eastwood for his gutsy ending of Million Dollar Baby and sympathized with his character and Hilary Swank's.
But this really pushes the limits of human decency, dignity, and respect for the gift of life. I literally felt sick to my stomach reading the article... that we as humans could actually condone this and that people who call themselves medical professionals could assist in something like this...
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| After finishing Systematic Theology 2 through InterVarsity's national staff training institute last Wednesday for credit at Trinity, I'm exhausted and overwhelmed but profoundly moved by the character of God as shown in Jesus Christ. The class was taught by InterVarsity Press's academic editor who studied under J.B. Torrance at Aberdeen and largely followed a Fuller syllabus rather than a Trinity one -- quite a contrast from the Trinity extension Systematic 1 from Spring 2008. I'm really thankful that I've experienced both approaches to theology and also for my strongly Dutch Reformed upbringing, the covenantal and Calvinistic teaching I received at CFC, and also the appreciation for Wesleyan teaching I received while working at Faith UMC.
After last week, I now feel what I imagine the disciples felt after witnessing Jesus' transfiguration: in some ways shock -- having too much to process through; in others awe -- at God's unimaginable holiness; and also thankfulness and gratitude that cannot truly be described -- at God's mercy and the fact that I, of all people, can actually partake in it.
Aside from a newfound appreciation for several theologians (Barth, Oden, Torrance) and approaches to theology (paleo-orthodoxy and postliberalism), I was challenged to really, truly consider what it means to know Jesus. Notably, previous definitions for the doctrine of election that I had known were shown as incomplete in Scripture. Our response as a class wasn't condescension or defensiveness, but awe at God's greatness and goodness and a desire to see the Church renewed and the world restored.
I'm currently meditating on Romans 9:13, the well-known "Jacob have I loved, but Esau I have hated" passage. God didn't hate Esau in the sense of wrathful damnation toward him -- it was in the sense of heartbreak and disappointment at Esau rejecting his call to be a part of God's redeeming plan for the world... just like Israel eventually and just as now the Church often come dangerously close to doing.
Even just writing this I feel heartbreak as I'm sure God felt toward Esau and Israel and now the Church. Though I still have a ways to go to understand this whole atonement thing and I don't quite understand all the current fuss over justification, I can't help but be moved by, and thankful for, the solution of the cross.
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| Per recent discussion regarding just how "biblical" the idea and word "imputation" are... I've been thinking of a lot of Christian extra-biblical "buzzwords" or phrases that often assume canonical or almost canonical authority even though they never occur in the Bible. Definitely not saying any of these are un-biblical... but perhaps they are often emphasized for historical or cultural reasons and the words or phrases themselves often take on a life of their own.
An incomplete list, arranged somewhat chronologically and with full awareness that a few of these are central to orthodoxy, some are not, and some are in-between:
Trinitarian, infallible, Reformed, revival, inerrant, quiet time, winsome, (leaving your) comfort-zone, multiethnicity, purpose-driven, creation care, missional.
I might comment on a few of these terms at some point...
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